Interview: Bank Muamalat

So aku tengok banyak yang search pasal interview Maybank. Hari ni nak cerita pasa interview Bank Muamalat. Position yang aku apply masa tu ialah product consultant. Tapi bila dipanggil, aku dapat untuk position lain.

Masa nak interview tu aku banyak baca pasal Bank Negara punya Guideline. Lepas tu pasal produk dan juga pasal basic knowledge masa belajar dulu. Tapi sebab aku tak banyak belajar finance, aku rasa macam sangkut sekejap time dia tanya. Dem. Apa yang korang perlu tahu, bila korang dah tercakap pasal benda tu, dia akan tanya je pasal benda tu.

Contoh. Aku ter-mention pasal SGF. Shariah Governance Framework. Habis pasal benda tu dia tanya. Sampai kan perbandingan pun. Jadi, korang yang tentukan ke mana nak bawa hala tuju interview tu. Dan kuasai basic knowledge untuk position tu. And good luck.

ps: result tak dapat lagi. Dan aku rasa aku tak dapat sebab aku lack of knowledge pasal finance.

Apa Erti Perkahwinan

Bila aku bertugas dalam guaman Syariah. Aku dapat rasakan kenapa suami isteri boleh bercerai kalau dah kawen 20 tahun? Kenapa? Aku saja nak share cerita ni. Harap-harap membantu. Manly tears shed.

“When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed -dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push through with the divorce.— At least, in the eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband….

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves.

So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don’t share this, nothing will happen to you.

If you do, you just might save a marriage. Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

Coffee.

Secawan kopi pada waktu pagi. Kopi sejuk dari dalam peti. Tambah sedikit ais ketul dan serpihan salji. Secawan lagi kopi isi dalam bekas kecil. Bekal ke pejabat untuk minum waktu rehat. Pulang ke rumah, dijamu lagi secawan kopi. Dengan seketul ais dan sedikit susu. Sebelum tidur air kosong sahaja. Supaya tak terjaga mata sepanjang malam.

ps: saya suka coffee.

Retis

Kadang. Aku terfikir juga. Best ke jadi artis? Best tak jadi Redza Minhat. Best tak jadi Ziana Zain. Best tak jadi Zizan. Kalau TV selebriti pun, best ke? Pergi sana sini orang tengok-tengok, pandang-pandang dan berbisik:

"Ni la retis yang kantoi cucuk botox tuh.."

Eh. Motif. Semua cerita dalam kain kelubung aku ko tahu? Sorry. Aku memang ada blog. Cerita apa yang aku suka dalam blog. Tapi cerita dalam kain memang tidak lah.

Bila aku jumpa artis, selebriti aku cuba untuk tak tengok diorang. Atau beri perihatian kat diorang. Bagi aku, mereka juga manusia biasa yang perlukan privasi. Kalau diorang nak perhatian sekali pun, bukan dari aku.

Kalau jahat sikit, aku siap tanya lagi "Muka macam familiar, pernah jumpa kat mana ya?" Pftt. Masa tu aku jumpa artis MyStar LG rasanya. Lepas dah lama sikit lepak tu baru aku cakap, "Eh u pernah berlakon video kontroversi tu kan?" Okay. Itu jahat. Muka dia merah kot. Sorry ya. :)

Oleh kerana kerja aku sekarang juga, aku ada jumpa dan meeting dengan sorang artis veteran ni. Yes. Dia ada rupa dan suara sedap. Tapi bila cakap dan serang aku. Aku nangis dalam hati. Siot. Tacing sial. Dia ingat dia retis, dia bleh marah aku. But, she said sorry. Apologize, accepted.


Antara artis yang humble aku rasa Irma Hasmie kot. Comel-comel je. Aku jumpa masa audition satu host stesyen tv dulu. Nais!


ps: muka aku gemuk kalau masuk tv. Benci!

Malam tadi.

Aku tengok jam pagi tadi macam biasa, 2 pagi. Damn. kenapa tak boleh tidor balik ni? Susah sangat nak lelap bila dah bangun. Aku gagah kan juga bila ingat aku tak Isyak lagi.

Aku buka lampu toilet, amek wuduk, capai air masak dalam peti ais aku gogok dua tiga teguk.

Aku kerjakan Isyak, solat sunat. Witir. Kemudian aku buka balik buku. Aku kena study untuk interview esok. Shariah Auditor. Penat juga. Sambil-sambil aku buka fesbuk. Dan cacah satu titik pada wall dia.

Dia whatsapp.

"Tak tidur lagi ke?

Aku reply: "Belum lagi, ko apasal tak tidur lagi?"

"Entah la, mata ni segar jer rasanya. Esok mesti sakit kepala.."

Sambil ber-whatsapp aku nyala sebatang Marlboro Light. Kemudian habis sebatang, aku buka roti, sapu peanut butter. Kunyah. Nyap nyap.

Mata tumpu pada bear. Bear tu aku ingat dia kasi lepas 3 bulan birthday aku. Kata dia,

"Ini wishlist awak kan? Saya beli kat Jusco tadi. Tapi tak la besar macam awak mintak.."

Walaupun tak besar, tapi besar makna bear ni pada saya.

Malam tadi aku tengok bilik kecil hanya terang dengan lampu tidur. Fikir mana hala tuju aku lepas ni. Apa yang aku nak capai. Apa yang aku nak? Semua hampir musnah bila aku fikir aku hampir tiada siapa-siapa. Hampir.

ps: You make me cry, make me smile, make me move like a child.

Remove

Dulu, kalau nak remove orang macam takut. Takut dia terasa hati. Tapi lepasa ada dua, tiga orang remove aku. Sebab apa tak tahu. Aku pun berani je la nak remove. Eh. Mampos la pundek anjeng (baca nada sopan). Aku punya fesbuk kan?

Kadang tu mungkin tak tahan dengan perbezaan pemikiran, berlainan politik, berlainan mazhab. Pernah juga bergaduh pasal syiah dan sunnah. Aku sunni. Dan aku gaduh dengan sunni yang lain kerana bahasa yang digunakan macam cilake. Rasa nak cili-cili je. Lepas tu bila tanya soal-soal usul, tak faham pulak. Macam mana orang yang menentang mazhab lain tapi tak habis mengaji ni? haish.

Lepas tu soal status aku banyak sangat kononnya. Meroyan la. Apa la. Eh. Status kau tu tak meroyan ke? Status kau tu kalau tak kerana kesian, takde nya aku nak like. Tak! Eh. meroyan dah. Haha. Mampos la. Tak suka? remove saja.

Susah juga berkawan dengan orang yang berbeza latarbelakang pendidikan dan pekerjaan. Rasa dia bagus. Berbeza umur pun susah. Kau dulu pun pernah ada pada tahap umur aku kan? So? Apa masalah kau? Kau dah merasa dulu, sudah la. Kalau aku sebaya dengan kau yang dekat 40 tu ye la. Dah tua-tua pun perangai serupa budak tak baligh.! Haish.

ps: ini bukan cakap dengan kawan-kawan dekat. Ni kawan jauh. Takde kena mengena dengan sesapa. Jangan nak sentap bukan-bukan. Lempang kang.

Motor dan Kereta

Korang pernah kena macam ni? Naik motor, lalu celah kereta, lepas tu kereta tu dengan bijak bestari nya tukar lane tiba-tiba, atau tanpa signal. rasa macam nak sepak je. Nasib baik motor aku ada horn. Aku horn kuat-kuat sambil menjerit dalam hati:

TEPI..!! TEPIII...!!